Well…it’s been a
roller coaster. In the past few weeks I
turned 40, found out I have skin cancer and experienced the miscarriage of our 4th
child.
I am learning how to open my hand to the gifts He gives - to see them as gifts...even when I don't like the wrapping paper.
Please watch this
VLOG (video blog) for some VERY HONEST talk – the pain and the joy of this loss. I share about what it was like to experience a miscarriage, how we have celebrated his life and other "gifts" I was not willing to see as "gifts."
Also,
we felt our child was a boy and named him David Paul. We had a memorial service for him on November 2,
2013 and asked our family to join us. Here here are some things each person shared:
For David Paul: A
Poem From Mama
Every
night
I
spoke to you in hope
Cradled
dreams
A
life without scope
I
loved every finger
Each
tiny toe
Your
heart was beating
So
fast...then too slow
I
carried you
Wrapped
in the darkness of my womb
But
now He carries me
You're
wrapped in the lightness of heaven's room
I
know your smile
And
see your face
The
road seems long
But
I feel His grace
My
true joy
Is
in the empty tomb
Death
has not won
We
will meet soon
So
Good Bye for now
My
David Paul
The
pain is deep
But
this is not all
A
thousand years
From
this Day
We'll
sit on that celestial shore
And
marvel at His Perfect Way
-
Your mama
Scripture from your
father
A note from your sister Jensen
Thoughts sent from my brother and his family (living in the Middle East)
Thoughts sent from my brother and his family (living in the Middle East)
Jaden: I know you will be
waiting in heaven to meet all of us. We can't wait to meet you.
Jett: I think you would
have been a wonderful boy and I would have been your friend.
Ava: The Lord loves you
and your baby. You will have a great time in heaven. I'll see you there later.
Alea: I will hold you in
heaven.
A Letter from Aunt
Erin:
Dear
David Paul,
These
days I find myself getting through the day by imaging what heaven will be like.
Lately, I've been imagining what it will be like to have our entire family
together ...in heaven...with no goodbyes. Goodbyes are my least favorite. I
can't wait to all be together, as one family, in heaven, never again needing to
say goodbye.
I
can't wait to meet you and learn about your personality. Please know that you
are so loved. We will have many adventures together! It's very special to know
you are in heaven waiting for your family to arrive. We love you so much and
can't wait for the day when we are united for eternity.
Love
you!
Aunt
Erin
Psalm for David (written
by Uncle Ken)
The Lord is my guide, my storyteller,
Who helps man to see in the dark,
Who gives understanding in chaos,
Peace, in the valley of the shadow,
He paints His wonders on the Earth,
Making beauty from dust,
And glory from the void.
He lifts my spirit with His Spirit,
From the womb He bore me,
Up on the wings of Eagles I flew,
He carried me from the land of the living,
To the Kingdom of warming light,
Where men dream Gods' dreams,
And walk once again in the cool of the day,
Unafraid, while the dew is till on the roses.
He places his arms around me, in His lap,
On His knee I sit, still with awe and wonder,
Listening to His Great Story, and,
Waiting for end of the age,
When I will see them, hear them, hold them,
My dear ones, the Lord's anointed,
Face to face.
- Uncle Ken
- Uncle Ken
A letter from my father (Bompa)
A letter from my mother (Grammy)
Scriptures from Karl’s mother (Mimi)
Scriptures from Karl’s father (Ppop)
We put everyone’s letter – along with our
precious baby in a tiny casket Jensen decorated – in this jar and buried him in
my parent’s back yard.
We love you, David Paul!
